Soymanella Poisoning

Edgar's picture

By LEE PITTS

I don't know about you but I became a little irritated when I read that two of the three largest meat processors have made sizable investments in upstarts that produce fake meat. So, in addition to all the other things we have to worry about, now we have to be concerned that somebody might be slipping us a seaweed burger or a tofu steak. As a public service I've made a list of ways to tell if you are about to eat, or have eaten, fake meat.

• Right after dinner there is a run on mouthwash, Pepto Bismol and Tic Tacs.

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